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Tag Archives: child care

Tears in Heaven (dedicated to the Connecticut Massacre Victims and Families)

I keep stopping while drafting this post.  Overflowing tears are blinding.

Tragedy strikes and you are engulfed in sorrow, disbelief.  Losing a child is like losing the ability to breathe, losing life itself.

Eric Clapton collaborated with Will Jennings to write this ballad in honor of Clapton’s four-year-old son Conor, who fell from a window of the 53rd-floor New York apartment of his mother’s friend in 1991.  What went on in Clapton’s mind the minute he saw Conor sprawled on the pavement? This song illustrates his grief and America comforted him hugely: the song is one of Clapton’s most successful and stayed in Billboard charts for weeks on end.

My heart goes out to the families and friends who are doing their best to cope with death.  Prayers keep one steady, retain peaceful and happy thoughts in one’s mind and heart —because how can you go on with your day when the person you love most goes away for good?

How can you put a handle on this pain that has intruded your sanity when lives have been snuffed out due to some heartless action?

There has to be a peaceful way out of this violence.  We get so hung up on laying the blame on just about anything in order to build up a story —because we are all clueless.

My friend says it quite aptly: we have long left love in the backyard of our dreams, sauntering out the door to meet with our egos.


3 Parenting Rules I Love To Break

I spoil my child —seriously, I do. Now, sue me.

Now I do not advocate that you go against the law; rather, I’d like to think I am doing my best to work with what little resources I already have just so I can peaceably raise a child who is already wonderful to start with (aren’t all kids angels, to start with?), without sacrificing happiness and good intentions.

Rule #1: If it doesn’t work, don’t push it. 

When sleep is the least attractive option (photo courtesy of sskies)

It’s nearing 11:00 PM and Gabby is far from feeling sleepy.  I tried luring her to bed with nursery rhymes but instead she’s shrieking and swaying to Psy’s Oppa Gangnam Style.  She didn’t ingest anything carbonated, caffeinated or drug-laced; it’s boundless energy that hasn’t dipped since 5:00 AM of the same day.  With dishes waiting in the sink, an unfinished web mock-up waiting to be integrated into an e-commerce site and a continuous lack of sleep in a span of three or five days, I closed my eyes and counted to ten.  Instead of scolding her, I bit my tongue, handed her her stuffed little Teddy to hug while dancing and offered her about three warm spoonfuls of easily digestible cereal.  At the end of the chorus she said, “Enough” then plopped herself on her side of the bed, still giggling.  When I handed her her Dinosaur toothbrush, she was already between sleepiness and wakefulness.

LESSON LEARNED: I was no longer concerned about going beyond her scheduled bedtime; what’s important is being sensitive to and respectful of what she wants (as long as it’s not harmful to her) as much as being aware of her needs.

Rule #2: Sweet doesn’t always spell H-A-R-M-F-U-L

Sweets for the Sweetest (photo courtesy of stock.xchng)

My daughter doesn’t like chocolates overmuch; but she loves gummy worms and Skittles.  I don’t deprive her of sweets in a way that when other parents may have shouted “Stop it!”, I proceed to offer her one more tiny handful.  Most times, she indulges but sometimes, she just doesn’t want to touch the stuff —although she picks up a small packet from a grocery aisle and hugs it till we reach the cashier section.

LESSON LEARNED: As long as she brushes and gargles her teeth after every sweet treat, I see no harm in offering her a tiny portion.  But when I want to indulge myself, I hide behind my work table and nibble on jelly beans and Skittles.

Rule #3: Stop complaining, it’s Barney Country

Sometimes, you’ve got to hand it to this moppet for effectively quieting even the most rambunctious of kids (photo courtesy of

There are days when Barney really gets to me…but some kids can’t seem to get enough of the purple dinosaur! Respectful of my daughter’s TV choices, the TV is eternally stuck on Barney channel that I wouldn’t be very worried in case the remote disappears (I would console myself into thinking it’s lost somewhere in the tree house amongst Baby Bop’s toys).

LESSON LEARNED: Buy another set, or do something else while the Boss is entranced by the moppet.

What are the top three things your child has done (or hasn’t done!) to change your life forever?

Pasta Primavera or Whatever You May Call It

Pasta Primavera or Whatever You May Call It

Happy Halloween!

Life can be like a plateful of spaghetti. Sometimes.

Spent the day doing exactly three of the best things I used to dream of:

1. Sharing a plateful of sweet spaghetti with my daughter in a busy fast food joint and I don’t even remember if I used extra catsup on the sauce

Whatever your poison is, make sure it’s cooked al dente

2. Playing “tickle wars”

Regularly invest in great bonding time

3. Falling asleep (well, I did it first and she followed suit) with my toddler holding me tight

You’ll never know when sleep overcomes even your greatest intentions to stay awake

What is the best thing that happened in your life after you discovered spaghetti?